In this post: This post explores genealogical collaboration between the author in Cincinnati and a DNA cousin in Brisbane, Australia. Together, they’re researching whether Ellen McAuliffe (in Brooklyn in 1857) and Margaret McAuliffe (in Australia in 1867) were sisters, both daughters of Florence McAuliffe and Ellen Healey from Listowel, County Kerry, Ireland. Using DNA matches across multiple platforms and family tree comparison, this international genealogical collaboration demonstrates why finding living relatives is the best part of genealogy.
Week 3 of #52Ancestors Challenge: What This Story Means to Me
Ask me why I do genealogy, and I’ll give you the answer that drives every hour I spend in dusty records and DNA spreadsheets: finding living relatives. Not just names on a census page or dates on a death certificate, but real people, breathing the same air I breathe, carrying the same questions I carry about our shared past.
That’s why my search for Ellen McAuliffe’s parents means more to me than any other research project I’ve ever undertaken. Because this time, I’m not searching alone. This is genealogical collaboration at its best – working with a living cousin across continents to recover our shared Irish heritage.
A Message from Brisbane
It was May 2025 when I received the message through Ancestry that would change everything about how I approach this particular brick wall. B.H. from Brisbane, Australia reached out about our DNA match. But the best part? B.H. offered her help. She wanted to share information about the family that she had already compiled.
I checked my DNA matches and B.H. and I are predicted 4th cousins sharing 17 centimorgans (cMs), while her mother and my father are predicted to be 3rd cousins at 26 cMs shared. Our parents also match on MyHeritage at 37 cM and have some very high matches in common. I’m still working on the FTDNA matches and the matches on LivingDNA.
Screenshot of DNA match between Kirsten M. Max-Douglas and B.H., AncestryDNA.1
Now, I know what experienced genetic genealogists are thinking – those aren’t huge numbers. The shared DNA is modest at best. While the DNA amounts aren’t large by themselves, taken together they form a consistent pattern. But here’s what made my heart race: we had enough matches in common to suggest we were genuinely related. And when we started comparing our family trees, a pattern emerged that made perfect sense.
Comparing Trees Across Continents
B.H. descends from Margaret McAuliffe, born in 1845, who emigrated from Ireland to Australia and married there. I descend from Ellen McAuliffe, who immigrated to Brooklyn in 1857 and married William Dowling in 1864. And here’s the tantalizing clue that brought us together: an Australian newspaper announcement of Margaret’s marriage identifies her as the “third daughter of Mr. Florence M’Auliffe, Listowel, Ireland.”
B.H.’s family knew of another daughter – Catherine, born in 1842. If Margaret was born in 1845 and the newspaper identifies her as the “third daughter,” then there’s a missing daughter somewhere. Either born between Catherine and Margaret (there’s a noticeable gap in B.H.’s tree), or perhaps even before Catherine.
My research places Ellen McAuliffe’s birth around 1844.
Could my Ellen be that missing daughter? Could B.H. and I share the same Irish 3x great-grandparents, connected through sisters who ended up on opposite sides of the world?
The DNA Evidence That Brought Us Together
Using my father’s DNA results and ThruLines® (Ancestry’s ThruLines® feature), the story becomes even more compelling. Sixteen DNA matches connect to Florence McAuliffe and Ellen Healey as a couple. Twenty-nine matches extend back to Ellen’s father, Timothy Healey, who would be the 4x great-grandfather of both B.H. and me if our hypothesis is correct.
These aren’t random coincidences. These are breadcrumbs left by our ancestors’ DNA, passed down through generations, waiting for us to follow them home to County Kerry.
But here’s what makes this different from every other DNA mystery I’ve tackled: I have someone to follow those breadcrumbs with.
What It Means to Not Be Alone
For the last couple of years, I’d been trying to trace Ellen McAuliffe beyond the United States without making much progress. I’d hit the usual brick walls – limited Irish records, common surnames in County Kerry, the challenge of tracing a 16-year-old girl who left no paper trail in Ireland before boarding a ship to America.
Then B.H.’s message arrived in May 2025, and suddenly the research opened up in a way it hadn’t before. She had pieces of the puzzle I didn’t have. I had context from Ellen’s American life that could help her understand Margaret’s origins. Together, we could see patterns that neither of us could see alone.
This isn’t just about having someone to commiserate with over dead ends – it’s about having someone whose research actually complements yours. When she shares information about Margaret’s family in Australia, it directly informs my understanding of Ellen’s possible origins. When I find something about the McAuliffe family in Listowel, it matters to both of our family stories.
We’re not competing genealogists who happen to be researching the same people. We’re partners trying to recover our shared heritage. There’s still a lot of work to do, but now we’re doing it together.
This is what genealogy looks like when it stops being solitary research and becomes shared memory.
The Geography of Connection
There’s something almost poetic about the geography of our genealogical collaboration. B.H. lives in Brisbane, Australia – roughly 9,500 miles from my home in Cincinnati, Ohio. Our ancestors’ paths diverged in the 1840s when Margaret chose Australia and Ellen chose America.
For over 160 years, their descendants lived completely separate lives on opposite sides of the world, unaware of each other’s existence. Margaret’s line flourished in Queensland while Ellen’s line put down roots in Brooklyn. Different continents, different cultures, different family stories passed down through generations.
And then DNA testing brought us back together.
In 2026, we can collaborate across those 9,500 miles as if we lived next door. We share our Ancestry trees, exchange messages, compare DNA matches, and piece together a story that belongs to both of us. Technology has made the distance irrelevant, but the shared purpose makes the connection real.
The Journey Just Beginning
I’ll be honest with you – B.H. and I haven’t solved this mystery yet. We connected in May 2025, but life got in the way as it always does. Work commitments, family obligations, the daily demands that pull us away from our genealogy pursuits.
But here’s what we’ve done: we’ve committed to 2026. This is the year we’re going to dedicate real time and energy to figuring out if Florence McAuliffe and Ellen Healey are truly our shared ancestors. This is the year we’re going to prove whether Ellen and Margaret were sisters. What we’re really trying to do is place two young Irish women back into the same family story—after history, distance, and time scattered them across the world.
Right now, our communication is simple – emails and Ancestry messages, shared DNA results, access to each other’s family trees. We’re still in that early stage where every exchange feels slightly formal, where we’re learning each other’s research styles and communication preferences.
But we’ve made a pact. We’re in this together.
Why This Matters More Than Any Other Research
I’ve solved plenty of genealogical mysteries on my own. I’ve broken through brick walls, identified unknown ancestors, and documented family lines that were nearly lost to time. Each success brought its own satisfaction.
But this is different.
This matters more because when we finally identify Ellen McAuliffe’s parents – and I believe we will – I’ll have someone to celebrate with who understands exactly what that discovery means. Not just professionally as a fellow genealogist, but personally as someone whose own family story depends on the same answer.
This matters more because I’m not just recovering my ancestor’s story anymore. I’m helping B.H. recover her ancestor’s story too. Our research serves two families, two branches of the same tree that grew in different soils for over a century and a half.
This matters more because genealogy, at its best, is about connection. Not just connection to the past, but connection to the present. Finding your people isn’t just about finding names in old records – it’s about finding the living descendants of those people and realizing you’re not alone in wanting to remember them.
The Best Reason for Doing Genealogy
If you asked me to name the single best reason for pursuing family history research, I would point to B.H. and this genealogical collaboration we’re building.
Yes, I love the detective work. Yes, I’m fascinated by historical records and DNA analysis. Yes, I find deep meaning in bringing my ancestors’ stories to life.
But finding living relatives? That’s the magic that makes everything else worthwhile.
B.H. and I are connected by DNA, yes, but we’re also connected by purpose, by curiosity, by the same questions that keep us both searching through Irish records and passenger lists. We’re connected by hope – the hope that 2026 will be the year we finally bring Florence McAuliffe and Ellen Healey out of the shadows and into our family trees where they belong.
Ellen McAuliffe crossed an ocean alone in 1857 at just 16 years old. Her sister Margaret made a similar journey to Australia. They likely never saw each other again after their respective ships sailed from Ireland.
But their descendants found each other. Across continents, across centuries, across the vast digital landscape of DNA databases, B.H. and I found each other. And together, we’re going to bring their story home.
That’s what this story means to me. That’s why genealogy matters.
Frequently Asked Questions About Genealogical Collaboration
Q: How do you find DNA cousins willing to collaborate? A: Start by reaching out through the DNA testing platform’s messaging system. Be specific about what you’re researching, share what information you already have, and ask if they’re willing to compare notes.
Q: What if DNA match amounts are small? A: Small centimorgan amounts (like our 17-26 cM matches) can still be meaningful when combined with multiple platform matches and tree evidence. Look for consistent patterns across several matches.
Q: How do you compare family trees across continents? A: Use shared DNA platform tools, exchange GEDCOM files, and focus on identifying the generation where trees should connect. Document everything with source citations to ensure accuracy.
What about you? Have you found living cousins through your genealogy research? Have you experienced a genealogical collaboration across distance to solve a shared mystery? I’d love to hear your stories in the comments below!
Upcoming Post: Read about my extensive research plan for Ellen McAuliffe and how I created it! This is one of my 2026 Bold Goals!
- Kirsten M. Max-Douglas, screenshot of DNA match between Kirsten M. Max-Douglas and B.H., AncestryDNA (https://www.ancestry.com : created and accessed 19 January 2026); privately held by the author. ↩︎
- “Australia, Newspaper Vital Notices, 1831–2001,” database, Ancestry (https://www.ancestry.com/search/collections/9091/records/91396295 : accessed 19 January 2026), marriage notice for James Barry and Margaret M’Auliffe, 30 November 1867; citing “Marriages,” Sydney [New South Wales] newspaper. ↩︎
- Kirsten M. Max-Douglas, screenshot of “Children of Florence McAuliffe and Ellen Healy,” BH Family Tree, Ancestry (https://www.ancestry.com : created and accessed 19 January 2026); privately held by the author. ↩︎
- Kirsten M. Max-Douglas, screenshot of ThruLines® for Florence McAuliffe, AncestryDNA (https://www.ancestry.com : created and accessed 19 January 2026); privately held by the author. ↩︎
- Kirsten M. Max-Douglas, screenshot of ThruLines® for Timothy Stephen Healey, AncestryDNA (https://www.ancestry.com : created and accessed 19 January 2026); privately held by the author. ↩︎
- Google My Maps, “Listowel, Ireland; Cincinnati, Ohio; and Brisbane, Australia,” showing relative geographic distances and migration endpoints; map created by Kirsten M. Max-Douglas using Google My Maps (https://www.google.com/mymaps : accessed 19 January 2026); PNG image in author’s possession. ↩︎
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